While I was eating with my family at a café here, suddenly, I heard a sound of a glass falling on the floor. It was a toddler who dropped the glass.
The father sitting next to him was so furious. You know lah, kid doesn’t behave, the father or mother sure gets very angry. So, the father stared at the toddler, as if the toddler had committed a serious crime. The toddler was so afraid that he started to cry.
The father couldn’t control anymore. He raised his voice and said, “Cry! Cry somemore!” When the toddler heard that, he cried even louder!
Now, this is the part I don’t understand. I don’t know whether this applied to only Chinese family or to the other family as well. Whenever a kid cries, the parents would always say this phrase; “Cry! Cry somemore!”. Then the kids would cry even more (although the initial intention is to tell them to stop crying)! But you can’t blame them. They’re just obeying their parents, don’t you think so? The parents ask them to cry somemore, so, they cry loh!
I just think that's one of the wrong ways to "teach" the kids but somehow, it's still being used from one generation to the other generation. How do you or will you tell your kids to stop crying? And is there anything which you disagree in teaching the kids but parents are still practising it now?
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22 comments:
I wud cry too if I was the kids.. I hear Malay family say that too.. it's more like a sarcastic remark lah but then they forgot kids don't know what that is ...:(
I see that often. Some parents don't have patience with their kids, sometimes I'm guilty of that too. :(
Brought up by a strict father who used cane whenever we made mistakes, we tend to follow his example too. :P
It does help because spare the rod and spoil the kids. There are too many spoiled brats in this world!
The poor kid must be scared and the only thing he could do was to cry his way out. Asian parenting skills are so different from western ones. Just cannot blame us as we are brought up this way..we just follow the leader.
GUILTY!
I say, "You cry..please...please..go outside and cry. I don't want to see you cry. You can cry all you want outside"...
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
EVIL Mu-um!!!!!
ladyjava: Yaloh, it's like a sarcastic remark. And I don't find it quite useful in asking the kid to stop crying.
ECL: Actually if one or two times you lose your patience with your kids, it's alright lah. Kids just need time to be taught, don't you think so?
I actually quite agree that if you spare the rod, you'll spoil the kids. That's why till now, when I see the kids are overboard and not being canned, it's not the right way to teach the kids. They should be punished if they're doing something wrong.
Yes, too many spoiled brats in this world!
sweetjasmine: Yes, when we were brought up that way, we would just follow. I think this kind of teaching methods are going to last forever.
mott: You're that kind of mum? hahaha! I did see mum like that too. Doesn't surprise me. :P
You're not an evil mum lah. To me, you're one of the greatest mum out there! If your kids are not fillial to you next time, I'll got to tell them how you sacrifice for them! hahaha! But I know they love you a lot. :)
Hi Kok,
I think the father left out the second part of the sentence, "Cry, cry some more, see I cane you or not'
I guess this is due to the fact that a kid will sure continue to cry if you ask him/her stop crying so the trend goes " cry, cry somemore...! BTW, can I link u in my blog? Thx!
u haven't have a kids, so u doesn't know that kids nowadays are naughtier than last time.
My kid starts crying even before we threaten to cane him or anything like tat. I think is he pretty manipulative. Hmmm... He was in a way quite spoiled by his coddling daddy.
I kept telling my hubby to be firm and a yes is a yes and a no is a no. No matter what the child tries. Cos if not, it would just confuse them and the end they would just manipulate us to their every whims. It's like all efforts by me gone down the drain.
In this situation you stated in your post. My most likely action would be to see if the child is hurt and to go grab him up. Then only chastises him and let him know the consequences of him not paying heed to our good advices. Then ask him what he feels about the incident and try to understand his rational.
Cos, it is really no point making a big scene like that and in the end embarrass and hurt the child's feeling and everybody else around you right.
i never say CRY CRY SAMO!
I only say...SAY NOTTY ? samo DARE TO say notty???!!
Wahhh! You got Entrecard too hor. Welcome!
I would not make that remark...it's the same when a kid falls down. If the parents exclaim that loudly, the kid will cry more. But just pick him up and dust him off, the kid will likely not cry! On the other hand, I'm not a parent! What do I know, eh? :o)
i think u did not here the 2nd part lar...
i will say, you wanna cry summore, i help you by canning you! LOL
sure stop one. hehe
That is what a typical parents of chinese would do .. the truth, i didnt see any other non chinese parents do that lor ...
ECL.. yelah after he won the 100 EC.. terus join...good hor.. now can drop by and get credit..
Kok...I saw your drop lah..you see me drop or not?? eh you got the credits plus bonus right?? now can advertise lah.. :)
jenjen: But I didn't hear that leh. Probably he's just too furious that he forgot. hehe.
dora: But then, they will cry even more if you ask them to cry more, no?
Thanks for the link! I'll link you tonight when I get back home. :)
hazel: I know the kids are naughtier these days. But to ask them cry somemore wouldn't help in teaching leh...
kleio: I agree with you. A kid should not be spoilt. Else, he'll go overboard! I guess, your boy still alright eh? At least, he still listens to you nowadays.
Wow! You're really a great mum! I think you do a good job if you were to act like that. Calm and steady. I guess with that kind of reaction, the kid will be ready to learn. And the best part, he won't make a big fuss out of it and embarass everyone around the table.
Good job there, kleio!:)
sasha: haha! You're one special one. Ask him say naughty and once he said naughty, you told him, DARE TO SAY NAUGHTY somemore! hahaha!
ecl: All thanks to LadyJava! kekeke!
wmw: That would be a good response. Cause I don't think it'll make the situation better if you were to make such remark.
miche: You sure they'll stop crying if you said you'll cane them? haha! I would try it on my little nephew and niece if one is crying. kekeke
DD: I also haven't seen any non-Chinese parent do that. Did your parents say that to you when you were a kid?
LJ: I got you 100EC liao! But then, how come I got extra 200?
I saw you drop here! I just don't know how to advertise lah. How ah?
Kok.. I decided to give you bonus lah.. so consider the 200 as a token of our new friendship :)
To advertise just got "campaign" and choose a category and then just click on whichever blog that you fancy and then look out for the words. advertise here..look at the points first lah.. then if you can afford. advertise lah..
Like ECL blog is very expensive you know..mine is still ok lah..hehe..
LJ,
So nice of you! Wah! Now I have something to spend liao! hehehe.
I wanna save some EC, so, I did try advertise in two of your blogs. ECL's blog is way tooooo expensive! Duhhh!
This is the part I no understand leh. My mum did the same thing to me, CRY SOME MORE, HAH! DO SOME MORE,or TALK BACK SOME MORE. And when I did, I got a huge smack across my face. Reverse psychology, see how it got me so twisted now?! Gotta blame my mum ler.... :P
sweetpea,
You also experienced the same? hahaha! I guess it must be a custom in Chinese's teaching. haha!
Oi I also use this phrase wor my ah girl and ah boy cry. "cry, cry somemore" Wah the louder they cry. Hahaha
suesue,
You also used the same phrase? They're just too guai lah. You tell them to cry, cry somemore, they just follow what you said lah. hahaha!
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